Monthly Archives: April 2009

Excuse me, can I get in? I’m the bride.

crowded

We are a year and a half away from our wedding day.  We have plenty of time.  No worries.  I’ve booked the photographer, the ceremony/reception venue, the caterer, the florist, the dress, and made the downpayment for the invitations.  Our budget has escalated some as we’ve refined our wedding day tastes, and we’re okay with that.  I still try to look for ways to trim our budget while still retaining the things that we love, and one idea keeps flashing in my mind:  Slash the guest list!   Yesterday, Miss Mary Jane of Weddingbee.com posted about this topic, and it got me thinking.  Reducing the guest list can be beneficial for many reasons. 

First, it’s the number one way of saving money.  We are spending roughly $75 per person for food and drink at our wedding, so cutting 10 people, for example, would save us $750.  That’s quite a chunk of change. 

Second, we are not overly social people.   On a typical Friday or Saturday night, you could most likely find us relaxing at home rather than being out and about.  A smaller wedding would be more in alignment with our lifestyle.

Third, my friends are currently dominating the guest list.  I looked yesterday at our rough draft of a guest list, and my friends alone take up over half of the invites.  This is a reality check.  I do not need to invite every last person that I know.  I have to come to terms with the fact that not inviting someone doesn’t mean you don’t like them or care for them. 

Because of this, I am considering cutting our guest list by about 40%.  Our venue will hold about 150 people for dinner.  Right now, our guest list sits at about 160.  Granted, not all of those people will be able to come.  If you follow the typical rule that 25% of your invitees can’t make it, then that puts our estimation at 120.  That’s pretty good, but I’d even be okay with the guest list going down to 100 even.  That would be swell with me. 

I think the slashing of our guest list will be relatively easy.  I will start with my co-workers.  I wouldn’t feel too terrible if I just said that I wasn’t inviting anyone from work.  A isn’t inviting anyone from his work…  It’s not a big deal.  I don’t hang out with anyone outside of school.  I may invite a couple choice people but make them swear that they don’t tell.  Or I may just say f-it, and not invite anyone from work period.  That would save 13 people right there. 

The other parts of our guest list that may not flesh out would be the group of friends who is a little unrully and doesn’t care to invite their significant others.  Don’t even get me started.  They are wild.  They are naughty.  They are fabulous.  So while I am inviting 16 people including spouses, really half of that won’t really come.  There’s 8 more guests chopped.

I am also inviting a handful of people that I worked with at my summer job in New Jersey which I had for years.  I love these people and would love it if they could come, but the reality is that they’d be traveling from far and (world) wide, so they may not be able to make it at all.  I’m guessing at least half of them won’t be able to come.  There’s another 5 seats saved.  So right there, I’ve mentally chopped off 26 guests bringing our guest count down to 135….and our budget down about $2000.  Makes sense to me.  Well.  That wasn’t so bad!  I’m going to keep chopping…

Is anyone else making “tough” decisions about their guest lists?

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Eeeeeeek! I need your help! I can’t decide!

weddingbee_kathlinargiro1

Okay, there’s something that you all need to know about me.  I am slow.  SLO-OW.  I just broke the word “slow” into two syllables to demonstrate my slo-owness. 

I take forever to make decisions, and I often change my mind much to the detriment of anyone who is present when I am trying to make a decision.  (Having a 26 month engagement has worked out perfectly for us because I can take my sweet time making every decision along the way.)

My girlfriends have long given up on going clothing shopping with me because I am the person who picks up a garment and carries it around for a couple of hours hemming and hawing over whether I really like it and can afford it.  In the end, after having made endure the endless ebb and flow of my opinion, I often put the garment back and walk out empty-handed.  This is a regular event. 

So now, I have a decision that I feel I need to make expeditiously:  the Kathlin Argiro rehearsal dinner dress.  I cannot make up my mind. 

Here is what I know:  My wedding gown and after party dress will both have a sweetheart neckline.  Because of this, I feel I need a different look for the rehearsal dinner dress.  I am also undecided if the Kathlin Argiro dress (KAd) will be used for my rehearsal dinner dress or my after party dress. 

Here are some dresses from KA that I like:

The Zoe dress:  Okay this dress had me at hello because it has POCKETS.  I have some kind of sick obsession with pockets.  This has a short hemline, but not too short…and it’s got a sexy v-neckline that will do justice to my cleavage.  I could order this in a white silk dupioni and use this as my after party dress.  Can you picture it with some cha-cha little heels? 

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And here is the Blythe dress.  I love it!  So very Jackie-O!  I don’t have any dresses that look like this, and it is decidedly different than my wedding dress/after party dress look.  I love this blue lace and the little flower.  The lace also comes in purple (ick) and white and pink.  I could also get this done in a silk dupioni (although that’s what my wedding dress is in, so maybe not) or a seersucker.  I’m a sucker for seersucker. 

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In white lace:

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And in a seersucker:

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I also love the Ballerina dress.  This is such a sweet little number.  Again, I’d probably order this in the seersucker, silk dupioni, or lace. 

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Help me to decide!  Weddingbee has already contacted me to ask which dress/size/material etc. I’d like to order.

I think I need to make a decision by the end of the day probably….oh dear.

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I’m a weener.

2ndplace

So after all the ongoing drama with the Weddingbee/Kathlin Argiro bridesmaid dress contest, they posted the results yesterday.  We did indeed come in second place.  Apart from the whole accusation of cheating thing, the contest was really fun and brought my bridesmaids closer together…even though it was all bonding over emails and what not. 

Lizz C. won first place, so she gets the loot:  5 bridesmaid dresses of her choice from Kathlin Argiro’s designs.  That’s so fucking awesome.  I really hope that beyond having a beautiful board, that her BMs truely deserve free dresses.  If they are rich bitches, then I am going to steam for a while.  And then I’ll get over it. 

Before I’ve mentioned that I’m having my bridesmaids pick out their own green dress, and I do really like that idea, so we are back to that after having NOT gotten first place in the contest. 

Unbeknownst to me, second place board gets a free rehearsal dinner dress for the bride.  Well…that’s ME!  I guess I didn’t realize this as I was too focused on first place.  I felt kind of sheepish emailing my bridesmaids saying, “Well thanks for working so hard to get votes for our board.  You get nothing, and I get a dress.”  I felt really sheeeeeeeepish.  I did not realize that second place got something.  As a cynical person, had I been my bridesmaid, I would have not believed me.  Of course, my bridesmaids are lovely people, so they’re happy for me.  I think.

So now the question is…what dress to pick…and in what size.  This is the way I think about this…

I have been toying with the idea that I would like a mini-version of my wedding dress to put on at the end of the reception for the last dance and then the transition to the after party. 

Below is a picture of what my dress will look like.  This is the jcrew Lucinda dress that I cannot afford at $2500.  Isn’t she lovely?  Isn’t she won-der-ful.  (Thanks, Stevie Wonder…)  As I’ve discussed in prior posts, I am having this dress made by the wonderously talented Etsy vendor, Beyond the Reflection, aka:  Brandie Thomas.  The dress will be made in silk dupioni and will only cost me $375!   

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As for the “mini” version of my dress, I have the following inspiration picture by Jim Hjelm.  The sweetheart neckline and pockets would be a perfect mimic of my wedding gown with a short and sassy hemline. 

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Of course, I have also fallen for etsy vendor, Sarah Seven’s little white number.  So sweet!

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And just to add insult to injury, let’s throw in an Oscar:

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Honestly, I love this dress so much, that I’m thinking about asking Brandie to make this one as well. 

Anyhoo, the question then turns, what do I order from Kathlin Argiro?  Do I order an after party dress?  Do I order a rehearsal dinner dress?  Do I order it in my current size, or the size that I’ve set my goal for for my wedding day?  Oooooh…that last one is evil!  But I just may do it!

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The solution to my indecision…

tornadolightningSo I’ve spoken before about my amazing planner, Cynthia, who is a total gift along this wedding adventure.  In the picture above, I am represented by the tornado with ideas flying around destroying everything in sight.  Cynthia is represented by the lightening bolt because she focuses my attention and grounds me.  (That was an electrical pun…excuse my lameness…)  Cynthia is fantastic at appeasing my ramblings and giving me a good dose of reality and vision along the way. 

Cynthia also will be my florist and has been utterly patient in the back and forth emailing and meetings about flowers.  As with all decisions made by me, I go through about 40 revisions before I settle.  Let’s take a walk through of the evolution of my flowers and decor ideas.

Soon after we were engaged, I found this picture of a bouquet of carnations. 

bouquet-15I thought the carnations were so pretty enmassed together, and I thought they would make lovely centerpieces and bouquets.  I even considered doing DIY centerpieces since arranging flowers is so easy right?  (Note the sarcasm. :-))

Then I started finding pictures of cymbidium orchids and fell in love.  This is when my wedding vision was much more streamlined and modern.  flowers-13

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At the time, I was imagining lots of geometry and minimalistic decor.  I realized in a panic one morning that my theme was bordering on Asian which was not the direction that I wanted to go. 

I have to thank Style Me Pretty for being the source of the inspiration for our wedding theme.  Their inspiration boards for all styles really helped me sort out my ideas and focus in on what I truely wanted to see for our wedding. 

I started to find pictures of peonies and garden roses that really made my skirt fly up:

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Gooooooooooorge!  Now we were getting somewhere.  I love the full, robust blossoms.  My vision became much more garden and much less modern…

Now my vision is as follows:

lush, garden, glow, warm, hospitable, rustle

While that doesn’t translate into flower names, it does sync with these pictures:

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I even found a bouquet that will use my original idea, carnations, and still go with this refined vision:

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So my flowers for bouquets and centerpieces now revolve around carnations, garden roses, hypericum berries, and bells of Ireland.  And some fruit…I’m loving the idea of incorporating some lemons and limes into the bunch!

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I’m such a tweet.

tweet

Okay, so you can now follow me on Twitter. 

I’ve heard so much mention of Twitter in the last month or so that I felt the need to check it out.  I am not sure if I’ve mentioned this or not, but I’m in school right now earning my masters in library and information science which basically equips me to be a librarian.  A large portion of the classes deal with technology and web2.0 programs.  Twitter has been mentioned from time to time, but I was basically clueless as to how it works.

In order to combat this problem, I have decided to be proactive in my technology expansion and get a little more cosey with Twitter.  I have spent an hour or two on the site, and after this time investement, I can confidently say that I still have no clue as to how it works. 

I’ve found a few folks on there to “follow”, which means that I have subscribed to a running post of all their updates.  So far I’ve found Pioneer Woman and Weddingbee, two of my all time favorite sites.  I feel kind of stalkerish at this point…hopefully that will wear off.  I mean, they want people to see their updates…right?  That’s why they’re on Twitter.

I haven’t figured out even 1% of the bells and whistles of this site yet…I don’t even know how to link you good readers to my Twitter home, but you can search for me there (JennyBryde, surprise, surprise). 

I will keep y’all posted as I figure more things out about this…or if I abandon it altogether due to frustration (a likely occurance).

Do any of you Twitter?  Give me some good advice or cool things to try in a comment below…

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Ants in my Pants

antsy1Today I find out whether or not I was hired for a teaching position in my dream district.  Wish me luck.  Lots o’ luck. 

Thanks.

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I’m a criminal.

bad-brideSooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo….hmmm……….where to begin?

First of all, thanks goes to all of you who read my begging post this week and plugged in a vote for my inspiration board on the Weddingbee.com contest.  Thank you! 

My bridesmaids and I were so gung ho and really had a great time pumping ourselves up for this contest.  Really, it’s just a silly contest, but it would have been fun to win.  So we plotted and planned and tried to brainstorm allllllllllllll of the people that we know that we could ask to vote. 

I asked my whole family to vote.  They asked their friends and co-workers.  I tried to get my whole staff at school to vote.  I contemplated sending home a link with my students to vote at home even, but quelched that idea as fairly unprofessional. 

I went through my email contacts and send everyone that I know an email asking them to vote.  I even asked our photographer and our wedding planner to vote. 

I went on Facebook which (admittedly) I rarely use anymore.  I was big into it when I was in college, but I just have let my account lie dormant for years.  But I was so excited to log on and realize that I had a couple of hundred friends who all agreed to vote.  So why do I deserve to be in a jailcell? Continue reading

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